Saturday, December 29, 2007

2007 ephemera


january

february

march

april

may

june

july

august

september

october

november

i started this at the beginning of 2007. it's an ali edwards idea, an easy way to document your year. all you have to do is throw little bits of things in the month's envelope as you go. it's kind of interesting to look back and see the changes. what i hung onto and had laying around. what months were full of happenings and what months were lacking in documentation. i'm planning on doing something of this sort again for 2008... i'll be getting it ready in the coming days.

and, another ali edwards idea, thinking of my next big idea/word to focus on in 2008.

Monday, December 24, 2007

happy holidays


some holiday jams. because christmas is probably the only time when listening to nsync is acceptable... and actually even expected. and no holiday mix would be complete without a little carol of the meows.

Thursday, December 20, 2007

inspiration


my aunt lil was asked to give an inspirational speech at her graduation from nursing school last week. this is what she wrote...

Inspiration – One day at a time

At five years of age I wanted to be a nurse; at seventy-five I am a nurse. I remember my dad taking me to the hospital when I was five. I was going to have my tonsils removed. I had badgered him to tell me all the gory details regarding a tonsillectomy. He asked, “Do you really want to know?” Well, of course I did. After the doctor examined me and said the operation was a go, I started screaming. I can still see the bewildered look in Dad’s eyes. Our saving grace, his and mine, came from this beautiful angel in white. She knelt down beside me and said, “You do not have to do this if you do not want to.” It was at that moment I knew I wanted to be as wonderful a nurse as my angel in white. We went home and I remained vocal. I knew when I grew up I was going to be a nurse. If the neighborhood kids got poison ivy, they called Lillian to apply the medicine. If a bird got hurt, Lillian was called to help it get better. If a baby was born, Lillian was there to help. Fifteen years and several strep throat infections later, the tonsillectomy operation was every bit as unpleasant as I thought it was going to be when I was five years old.

On my sixteenth birthday, I applied to nursing school. I had chosen to go to the college preparatory high school in my hometown rather than the high school that prepared students for the business world. There had never been a doubt in my mind of the direction I was going to take in life. Three weeks later my dad died. Now my goal, and my family’s wishes, was that I should be the first in my generation to finish high school and “We will talk about your going to nursing school later.”

Life got in the way. What I did do was graduate from high school. Then I married and moved from Connecticut to Michigan. I started a family. Family responsibilities filled my life. I fulfilled my desire of becoming a nurse by nursing my children through the measles, the chicken pox (all four children had them at the same time), and the usual runny noses. What I could not heal was a failing marriage and divorce followed. I went to school to learn shorthand in order to keep a roof over the heads of my children and myself, and put food on the table. I took a job as a secretary. This career lasted a short 48 years.

I enrolled at Wayne State University to further my business career. Thirty credits into the program my youngest son was diagnosed with osteogenic sarcoma. Here was another opportunity to further my love of nursing. I dropped out of school and home nursed him. I learned so much from my “professor”, things like patience, laughing, what Star Trek was and especially courage. After he died, life kept pulling and tugging at me.
One day a fellow came into my life. Before I knew it, I was married, working and going to college, Madonna University. My goal was to receive my business management degree. Why business management and not nursing? Because I felt I was too old to become a nurse.
Life was good. I graduated with my bachelor’s degree in business management. I decided a career in Hospice would be fulfilling. In 1990 I enrolled in the new hospice program Madonna University was offering. This was my opportunity at last to get into the medical field. Three weeks later my husband almost died. For the next ten years he almost died at least one time each year. Of course, I nursed him. Then he died. This bump in the road of my life created its own challenges.

Now I had the monumental task of trying to choose what to do with 86,400 seconds in a 24-hour day. My first year as a widow, I explored the world. I volunteered for my local hospice program and for the hospital auxiliary. But, I was not happy. I visited people who for so long had been my support system, who had brought the outside world to me at a time when there were not enough seconds in my day. Now they were happy that I had time to enjoy life, rest a little, and not overexert myself. I went against the advice of these same people who loved me. I started the groundwork for my second career. At 70 years old I was going to go to college to become a nurse by furthering my education at Madonna University.

I could have given up, but look at what I would have missed. I would never had known how difficult, how exciting, and how fulfilling working towards a nursing degree would be. I would not have met dedicated professors. I would not have had the opportunity to interface with the enthusiastic students I have studied with. Five years before my husband died, my daughter was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. How different my world would have been without the support of my peers and faculty when she passed away this past year. They gave me their wings to hold on to as I struggled to survive this new catastrophe in my life. I am eternally grateful for their compassion, and their encouragement. I am amazed at their optimism for what the future holds.

If ever there was a time I would have liked to drop out of school, I would have to say it was at exam time, any exam, every time. But, I had to hang in there. By now my friends and loved ones were bragging about me, telling me I was an example for them. They were proud of me. How could I possibly disappoint them? They thought I was something special; they almost killed me with their love.

Look at me now. At 5 years old I wanted to be a nurse and 70 years later I am one. What would have happened to me if I had given up my dream of being a nurse? If I had given up my dream I would not have known what came after, the knowledge that I now have both the opportunity and the ability to help others. What I have to offer gives me fulfillment and so every second of life is meaningful. My advice to anyone pursuing a dream is to never give up.

Hospice still feels like a good fit for me. I can’t wait to get started. I intend to incorporate all I have learned during both my life’s experiences and my nursing education to be the best nurse I can be. As I reflect on my life’s experience, my heart tells me I have compassion. By keeping focused on my patients’ needs, my knowledge and skills will benefit each patient I care for. If they will let me, I will be honored to walk beside them on their journey home. At 75 years of age, I have been through the hardest times imaginable. If I can achieve my dream anyone can. Thank you for listening.

thank you, aunt lil, for being an inspiration.

Sunday, December 16, 2007

from detroit to baltimore, and back again


this past semester investigating baltimore, i have often been reminded of detroit. there are so many similarities between the two places, but for some reason i only feel such a sense of urgency when i'm in baltimore. maybe i've just been surrounded by detroit my whole life that i need to step away from it for four years to be able to return and truly see it with new eyes. but when i'm traveling home, (wherever that happens to be for three days, five weeks, or a semester) both places stay at the forefront of my mind and i search to connect and reconcile the two.

i've already stumbled across two thing that are making the connection for me.

an entertainment type newspaper my dad saved for me with john waters on the cover holding a "baltimore city jail" sign. crime and john waters, how much more stereotypical can you get? but there was some truth hidden in the article- john waters on detroit: "john waters says he likes detroit because of its connection to his beloved baltimore, where he still lives and sets all of his films. both cities, he says, have suffered from negative publicity and an inferiority complex. 'we've been tough and funny and praised stuff that other people would try to hide,' he says. 'we've made it a style.'"

and a week-long detroit free press project called "driving detroit: it's worse than you think- but better, too." this was an exciting find for two reasons:

one, i've been wanting to do this thing for a few years now, sort of a photographic documentation/mapping of woodward avenue from start to finish. it's one of those ideas that i know is good because it has stuck in the back of my head for so long. i can see it so vividly. a panoramic type bridging together of photographs covering every inch of the street, covered with a long transparent overlay that would begin to get deeper with details and handwritten street names, and something that would come together and be displayed on the walls around a big gallery space. maybe now that i have all this winter break time on my hands i'll actually start doing it. just seeing the tagline for "driving detroit" on the cover of the free press gave me the comfort of knowing someone else is thinking the same thing. that's when it becomes more of a mentality, maybe eventually even a movement.

two, mapping has been a hot topic in baltimore. it's something that was introduced to me my first day of finding baltimore when we made self-maps. something that we are, at a basic level, asking each kid to do when the create something for "a neighborhood called baltimore." it's also the topic of a major exhibition coming to the walters art museum next year, "maps: finding our place in the world," and the community generated project presented in tandem, "maps on purpose," conceived by baltimore's art on purpose. it's also something that i'm finding more and more that i need to do for myself, lay it all out on the table and start connecting the dots.

fresh snow

Friday, December 14, 2007

a neighborhood called baltimore


mounting a major exhibition the same day i pack and fly home? yeah, that means i start loosing things (like my id, grant receipts... mind.) and that i had to give up a little bit of control. that's a big deal for me. i couldn't make my way down to the enoch pratt free library central branch (where we are having our first a neighborhood called baltimore exhibition!) and still catch the shuttle to the airport. so i really have no idea what this thing looks like. i must really trust these people. (we all go to art school so i don't have to worry about anything too horrible happening with the curation.) and really, all the pieces are in place... so i am sure that it will be absolutely amazing!

i did the a neighborhood called baltimore project with ms. pan's class today, too. it was our last class with them... so we had to give them a little something. we made little mica art sets with a mini sketchbook, 3x5 canvas, and brush. & inside the sketchbook we wrote: "we loved making mica art with you! keep creating! love, miss. madeline and miss becky!" ms. pan invited us to come back next semester whenever we wanted, so i hope i get the chance to work with this group again. they were so great... and we were really able to challenge them! it was a perfect fit for me and good introduction to mt. royal elementary. i feel like i have more of a stake in it now, and it's not just a building that i walk past everyday to get to class. there are now 15 second graders in there that i know and love.